Snow Joke!

And so the snow finally came

But it didn’t prevent me from getting to work 

T’was a bloody signal failure

That drove me bloody berserk

Battled through the ice

Skated the pavements and rode a bus

Travelled on the tube

Finally reached Highbury & Is

To find all Stratford trains cancelled 

Though I waited and waited – in vain

To discover said signal failure

Had afflicted TFL again

Oh what a merry cock-up! 

I feared the weather would be the culprit

That ultimately prevented me reaching

My destination – but that wasn’t it!

When will these signals be fixed?

Is a snowflake their kryptonite?

They’re always breaking down 

And must be considerably shite

To render a whole line defunct

A station unreachable

To cause them to send everyone home 

And make them miserable

So back the way I came I trudged

Developing frostbite, hypothermic and miffed 

All the while sending explanatory emails

To my bosses who could’ve been p****d

That on the very day of my appraisal

The most important one of the year

I couldn’t make it to the office 

Due not to snow but signal failure 

The same old boring chestnut 

That repeatedly blights the lives

Of poor, downtrodden commuters

Who are robbed by the extortionate price

Of a beyond sub-standard service

They are forced everyday to endure

They have no choice, it’s a sacrifice

They undoubtedly wish they could be spared 

Well, thank heavens I had my laptop

Having feared I’d be snowed in

But like I said t’was bloody signal failure

That foiled me once again.

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