Adverts, adverts, adverts
I royally detest
Non-subliminal brain washing
Of the masses – I protest!
Telling me what to buy
Vacuuming up my cash
Greedy, guzzling commercials
Horrible, stupid trash
Every couple of minutes
On most tv stations
They churn them out incessantly
For every conceivable occasion
Making out I need
The shite they’re trying to flog
And if the product is dull
It’ll be accompanied by a cute dog
Or a half naked woman
Who’s impossibly beautiful
Or a chisled, ripped young man
Semi-clad and in a thong
Even food is sexyfied
With a voiceover akin to Je T’aime
And it’s ok if I swerve it
For they’ll repeat it over and over again
Until it’s ringing in my ears
And I’m singing it in my sleep
Until I can’t even bear to watch
And the jingle makes me howl and weep
Until I’ve lost the will to live
And have scratched out both my eyes
Or until I’ve hurled my tv out
Of the window and seen it fly
These adverts make me seethe
They’re on longer than the programme itself
And if you want to continue watching
You’re condemned to enduring them as well
So I seldom switch the thing on
For mostly it’s a box of crap
A vehicle for peddling junk
And quite frankly I can do without that.
Rachel Rhodes 