Why they call them wisdom teeth
I will never know
There’s nothing clever
About enduring excruciating pain
When these bastards decide to blow
When they flare up
And your nerves are raw
On red alert
Throbbing and taught
You know the meaning
Of true face ache
This agony
Is f**king hard to take
All one side
Of my swollen head
Is puffy and bruised
Like a machete’s been buried
In the left temple
Of my bonse
Like Elephant Man
I’m grotesque and deformed
Sweating cobs
Screaming within
A purple shiner
On my chin
Jaw locked shut
Can barely fit a straw
Impossible to eat
Appetite pretty poor
My putrid tooth’s
Left a gaping hole
That wasn’t packed
So I’ve been climbing the walls
My sadist surgeon
Told me to go to the dentist
He only did half a job
And boy, am I p**sed!
That he could have left me
Without antibiotics
The man’s deranged
Borderline psychotic
Been chomping at the bit
Gradually getting worse
Sleepless nights
Going berserk
No way to escape
Just forced to put up
With the brutality
Of having had my mouth sawn up
The tooth wouldn’t come out
It was impacted so deep
Pressing against a nerve
Paralysis nearly for keeps
He must have yanked
And he must have sliced
He must have dug
And drilled with all his might
And now I am left with
This living hell
When will it end?
Someone ring the bell!
I’ve downed almost a whole
Packet of pills
They make me zombified
And queasy, give me chills
I’m sick of this horror show
I wish it would end
It’s beyond interminable
And driving me round the bend
No silver lining
That I can see
Just burning and throbbing
Woe is me!
Rachel Rhodes 