I really don’t understand

The point of this thing called life

I feel I’m just stuck passing time

Until I’m released unto a realm without strife

To motivate myself at all

It’s such a chore everyday

Unfulfilled and mostly isolated

I trudge on feeling abject dismay

My aspirations out of reach

What I strive for just doesn’t materialise

I’ve lost my sense of purpose

I don’t understand why I’m alive

It’s not that I wish to be dead

But I’m existing in a vacuum of bland

Little excites me anymore

The tedium wasn’t something I planned

Loneliness and lethargy

Set in some time ago

But this insane pandemic has finished me off

And now all I feel is woe

I don’t know how to amuse myself

How to fill the emptiness

I wish something awesome would f**king give

So I don’t feel such waste and a mess

Age is creeping up on me

Energy sapped and scarce

Nothing to aim for except to earn a crust

But even that is something perverse

Can’t get paid to do what I love

So prostituting myself for cash

For way too long have I walked this path

That I thought was temporary – what a laugh!

I want to fly away, run, escape

But where the heck would I go?

This cage I’m in trapped in is holding me tight

What a veritable, interminable sh*t show.