T’was the dawn of Boxing Day
In misty Manningtree
The whole house was snoozing
When I awoke for a wee
So I had one of those
Then sought out my phone
But could I eck find it
Though all over did I roam
But in doing that
I accidentally
Left open the kitchen door
Setting Charlie free!
And the excited whippet
Couldn’t believe his luck
As he shot towards the stairs
And like lightening bolted up
Galloping and gleeful
He sought out his humans
Who were soundly sleeping
Inside their rooms
With his generous snout
He nudged open their doors
As a mortified me
Stood there and watched
‘Oh Lord!’, thought I,
‘They’ll be prematurely woke.
Somehow I must coax him
Downstairs – what a joke!’
For he was dying to see them
As beloved were they to him
Thus he turned on his paws
And accelerated in
To the master bedroom
Disturbing Line
Who in being licked
Got a soggy surprise
She sleepily exclaimed
‘What’s the dog doing in here?’
As I quaked in my boots
Riddled with fear
I had to fess up
I was the culprit
Who’d left open the door
Releasing the whippet
Who now had to round him
Somehow back up
Redeposit him in the kitchen
With it’s door firmly shut
But try catching a rogue whippet
Who’s on the run
When you’ve had no caffeine
And you’re not an Olympian
Farcical it was
Like the Benny Hill show
As he ran a zillion rings around me
Because I was too flaming slow
Wearing me out
Til I was in a sweaty heap
Til I surrendered and went in search
of a supersized coffee
Then the little tinker
Decided to follow me
To the target kitchen
Most obediently
So I seized the moment
Like Carpe diem
Fermed la port
Vowed never to open it again
Realised I was victorious
In a very roundabout way
Charlie was back in his boudoir
And the Djuve-Woods in bed could stay
The moral of this story
Is never try too hard
Everything will fall into place
Although whippets will you outsmart!
Rachel Rhodes 