Wrecked

Such a lack of hope

Life in irreparable tatters

I do not think I can cope

Dreams and aspirations beyond shattered

Struggling to progress at all

Obstacles too huge, impassable, I fall

On to my knees entreating God – please!!!

Unforesake me – I can’t take anymore!

Release me from these chains

Set me free from the demons that plague

Salvage what’s left of me from this wreck

Resuscitate me, inspire me, I beg!

There’s literally nothing left

And still deeper and deeper I plunge

Into a desolate quagmire 

Strengthless and limp I succumb 

I truly am finished

Smashed apart against the rocks

Of a derelict desert island

Away from civilisation – devoid of luck

The blessings I once had

Ripped away from me and lost

Just my battered body

And the rags I wear I’ve got

No assets

Few possessions

No house

No friends nearby

A wearyness

I cannot shake off

A cup no longer full

But bone dry

Ostracised from my former life

Cast unto an alien place

Where I really don’t belong

From which I ran and which I still hate

I literally have NOTHING

No family – but one

Who falters more every single day

Without whom I shall be entirely alone

All I see before me

Is more loss and isolation

I have never ever feared life itself

But these constant tribulations

Have ground me down to such a halt

I am paralysed to the core

Trapped in a vault that relentlessly compresses

Buried in a tomb without a door

But still I am breathing

And my heavy heart beats

Still I have eyes with which to see

The extent of my defeat

Still I have emotions and can feel my pain

Still I have memories that will

not go away

Still I am conscious when I truly wish

to not exist

Still I envy others and their happiness and gifts 

Lord, make it stop!!!

Enough!!!! It has to end!!!!

I want out!!!

I am done making amends!!!

I am done starting over!!!

Done with picking up the pieces!!!

This shit is too much!!!

I cannot iron out these creases!!!!

You’ve taken too much

There is FUCK ALL left

So you may as well come back if you dare

And fucking take the rest.