Crash, bang, wallop

She collided with the shelf

A free standing unit

Until she grabbed it to steady herself

Down did it topple

Raining glass on her head

Sending everything flying

Through the air, what a mess!

Wine glasses, flutes, tumblers

And a vase

All hit the deck

And smashed into shards

Oh, what a racket

And a mess to behold

The nincompoop just stood there

And couldn’t be consoled

But it’s no use crying

Over spilt milk

And in her inebriated state

The thought of cleaning did she jilt

Drunk and disorderly

She sent herself to bed

Knowing that tomorrow

She’d have a thumping head

So leaving shattered


All over the floor

Off did she teeter

To think about it no more

In the afternoon

When at last she awoke

The carpet was glistening

As if covered in snow

It shone and it sparkled

Like a night of a thousands stars

She wondered what’d occurred

Until her memory was jarred

By treading barefoot

Onto a sizeable piece of glass

That tore into her instep

Causing her to curse

Jumping up and down

With stinging, bleeding feet

She surveyed the considerable damage

Shocked at the scene

Of all her lovely glassware

Lying broken on the floor

A shattered picture frame

A teacup that was no more

Oops, thought she

What a flaming disaster

I’d better get a shovel

And hoover up straight after

And so she did

And all was fine

Apart from the gash

Which would heal in time

The moral of this story

Is nail your shelves down

And don’t put glass atop them

If you’re a drunken clown.

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